We learn how to grieve al Kiddush Hashem from Reb Gabriel Sassoon who lost his seven children in a tragic fire on Shabbat Rosh Chodesh Nisan 5755.
People grieve because they want to stay connected to the ones they lost and grief is a way to feel that connection. If they were to stop grieving they would stop thinking about their lost ones and feel disconnected so instead they choose to wallow in the pain. However they don’t realize that you can maintain that same connection to the departed through love. You can still love those you lost, do things in their merit and thereby maintain that connection. Love life, except that which Hashem puts into your life and stay focused on the positive. Even from a huge tragedy like this, there is positive. Every human being has a choice to either wallow in apathy, anger, grief and despair or realize that Hashem is in control of everything, be at peace with it, find the positive, even find the opportunity in it and you can live life to the fullest, even under the most trying of circumstance. — Reb Gabriel Sassoon